This lesson can be both difficult and exulting. Our LDS understanding of the next life both inspires because of the idea that our relations have an eternal permanence, and troubles many of us because of what we don’t understand about polygamy and the details of how the multiple relationships we begin on earth translate into the eternities.

Since this is about our conception of the next life, when we evaluate one position or another, we need to consider cases such as those who are widowed and remarry as well as those who never marry and those who are in abusive or unequal marriages. Regardless, the intimate nature of family relationships makes these questions difficult regardless of your beliefs.

In Sunday School it may be best to avoid discussing polygamy altogether, but because of the complexities of this life that may not be possible, especially because the concept that earthly relationships can be exalted often involves complexities that are difficult to resolve.

Exaltation isn’t easy, and it isn’t easy to understand.

 

God wants to exalt His children.

The issue behind all of the difficulties in this lesson is what it means to be exalted—what is life in the hereafter like. So let’s start from the basic premise, that God wants us to be exalted, to become like him. And it seems to me that the premise that God wants us to be better is almost universal among those who believe in God.

This poem urges us to remember the basics of the plan of salvation, the way that we believe human beings become exalted. The poet, Maud Baggarley, appeared frequently in LDS publications, especially the Young Woman’s Journal, at the beginning of the 20th century. Her obituary attributed her early death at age 39 to the shock of hearing that her parents and sister had died in an automobile accident, and in the context of this lesson the idea seems poetically appropriate, although the timing of her November 1918 death suggests that the influenza epidemic might have been involved.

 

Earthly Mission

by Maud Baggarley

O never forget thou art part of the plan

To exalt, to bring joy, and to glorify man.

Thou wert chosen and called when the stars on high sang,

And when with hosannas the courts above rang.

And if thou art mangled and spit upon, torn,

Beaten with stripes, or crowned with the thorn,

Rejoice, O thou martyr, anointed and brave;

Thou art filling the mission the Lord himself gave.

Oh, be like an angel, all splendid and white,

With a pure, inner radiance—the soul’s flaming light;

Thy sorrows bear bravely, and never give pain—

Then earth shall receive its old glory again.

1911

 

God blesses people who obey His laws.

Tied up in the idea of exaltation is what we need to do to become more like our Heavenly Parents. Ordinances like baptism are certainly part of the plan, as is obeying the principles of the gospel (although this is likely much more complicated that this hymn suggests).

This poem appears in the first LDS periodical, and was selected by Emma Smith for inclusion in the first hymnal a couple of years later. I haven’t found any non-Mormon publication, so I assume it is an LDS work, but we don’t know for sure who wrote it. Historically, it was sung at baptisms.

 

For Baptism

by anon.

Come, ye children of the kingdom,

Sing with me for joy to day;

Gather round, as Christ’s disciples,

Kneel with grateful hearts and pray.

 

There’s a line contain’d in Matthew

What the Savior said to John,

And the sacred words from heaven;

This is my beloved Son.

 

As ’twas said to Nicodemus,

So I must be born again;

‘Tis by water and the Spirit

I the promise may obtain.

 

So I will obey the Savior,

Keep his law and do his will,

That I may enjoy forever,

Happiness on Zion’s hill.

1833

 

Heavenly Father made it possible for families to be eternal.

LDS theology emphasizes that family relationships can be eternal, and I suspect other relationships can be also. The sealing is a key element in our understanding of the eternities and of the purpose of mortal life.

And this emphasis appears often in LDS poetry, especially in wedding poems. A common use of poetry was as a commemoration, or expression in reaction to the major events of life — births, weddings, deaths, birthdays, etc. And in the 19th century these personal poems sometimes found their way into print. The following poem, written by Eliza R. Snow to commemorate a wedding, gives marital advice that mixes the eternal with the mortal, showing that they are not really separate, but rather part of a long eternal existence.

 

Hymenial D. A. & E.

by Eliza R. Snow

When you in wedlock bands are join’d

O may your hearts remain

Forever one, that you may find

No fetters in the chain.

 

List, list not to the fickle strain

That fancy’s minstrel swells—

Think not on earth, without a pain,

The goddess Pleasure dwells.

 

But heav’n has sent affection here

For kindred hearts to share—

To chase from sorrow’s eye, the tear,

And smooth the brow of care.

 

And of its genial pow’r possess’d,

Your path with light, will glow;

And with its heav’nly music blest,

You’ll taste of bliss below.

1862

 

Plural marriage is acceptable to God only when He commands it.

While I’ve hinted above at the idea that some kind or degree of plural marriage in the eternities is inevitable, unless our relationships in this life do not continue in the next, I can’t logically say exactly how those relationships are structured. Even polygamous relationships in this life have been complex and difficult—while often fraught, they had benefits as well, and women regularly and vociferously defended them.

This defense of polygamy was written by one of the most important LDS poets of the 19th century. Emily Hill Woodmansee’s own marital history was itself difficult. An English convert, she immigrated to Utah in the Willie handcart company in 1856. Having survived that ordeal, she married fellow poet William Gill Mills the following year as his second wife. Within four years Mill abandoned his families, and Emily eventually re-married to Joseph Woodmansee in 1864, as his third wife. So when she defended polygamy, she knew all about its difficultiess as well as its advantages.

 

A Woman’s Plea for Polygamy

By Emily H. Woodmansee

When Abraham, “The Faithful,” offered up

The prop and hope of his declining years,

“Twas counted unto him for righteousness.”

And if in these last days the Lord should say—

Offer your dearly cherished idols up,

Shall not His chosen people do His will?

For not to do our own will, but the will

Of God our Father, do we dwell on earth,

That thorough obedience and through sacrifice

We may be counted worthy to receive

Crowns, immortality, and endless lives;

To dwell forever in our Father’s presence

And live eternally with those we love.

For Mormon women love intelligently,

And purely too as other women can.

Their sensibilities are keen and true,

Their capabilities will match the best,

And if they have no souls (for them I boast),

The lack is well supplied with conscience.

We love our husbands, but we worship only

The Lord our God, and Him alone we serve.

For none are worthy of our adoration,

Save Him in whom we place our highest trust.

Yet while we own that man is fallible,

Our ears are weary of the prating talk

Of woman’s vast superiority,

Of woman’s rights, and woman’s privileges,

And of the sighs and groans and sympathy

That all fair Christendom for us expend.

‘Tis waste of pity, for we need it not.

We know our place, and by God’s grace will fill it.

And this we know, that woman’s holiest right

Is to be loved and owned as wife and mother;

Not only to be cared for in the flush

Of beauty and of youth, but also when

Maternal cares and toil affection brings

Have paled the cheek and age has dim’d the eye,

Then, having filled her mission well and bravely,

(A woman’s mission, arduous to fulfill,)

It is her right to be still more revered,

To have affection and protection tooo;

Till, like a shock of corn that’s fully ripe,

She’s gathered upward to her well earn’d rest.

It is not woman’s right to stand between

Her husband and his conscience and his God.

man at the first was “lord oof the creation,”

With God like qualities and grace endowed;

With strength and wisdom to direct his household

In the appointed ways of righteousness,

But now it is conceded unto womman

To hold the reins of household government;

And men have sunk as low as to become

Slaves or seducers of the weaker sex.

Oh, Christian age! Enlightened century!

That lauds us women to the highest heaven,

Or sinks us in the lowest depths of woe,

And rails and raves at patriarchal law,

As an indignity to woman offer’d;

As though a medium of respect and love,

Was not much better than such false extremes.

The Lord Himself to mother Eve declared

That her “desire should be unto her husband,

Her lord and ruler.” Now her daughters scorn

This natural law, and count it as an insult.

It is indeed a harsh and stern decree,

Where love is not abundant and abiding,

Nor can true woman thus submissive be

To any man of mean inferior mind;

Yet ’tis her joy and glory to obey

One that adorns his right of government;

A man of wisdom and of mind enlarged,

Dauntless and fearless as a man should be,

Yet with a heart as tender and as true

As woman’s own; a man that looks

On woman in the truest, holiest light.

Not as his born superior, but as

God’s precious gift, to be esteemed and prized

Man’s fitting crown, and worthy of his care.

Could such a man degrade her? Truly no,

Noot even if he had a dozen wives,

No more than could the holy patriarchs’ names

Degrade the “Book of books!” Blot out their names—

The names of Abraham, and Jacob too,

Of priests and prophets “after God’s own heart,”

Worthy to be Christ’s own progenitors,

To whom God gave not one, but many wives,

And children “as the stars for multitude,”

Blot out their names, or hold them up on high

To infamy and shame, resign the hope

Of sitting down in heaven with all these men,

The faithful friends of God, “the just made perfect,”

And I shall think the so-called Christian world

Has donned the garment of consistency.

Till this they do, my conscience cannot choose

But to submit most cheerfully and proudly

To what my conscience and what God approves.

1868