![\"What](\"http:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/wp\/wp-content\/Truman.jpg\")
<\/p>\nNEW PRODUCT ANNOUNCEMENT<\/p>\n
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE<\/p>\n
AUSTIN, Texas \u00e2\u20ac\u201c October 28, 2004 \u00e2\u20ac\u201c Smith Industries LLC today proudly announces the release of their latest product, Child 3.0. Also known as \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Truman Michael Smith,\u00e2\u20ac? Child 3.0 has been under development for nine months and arrives just in time for the holiday season.
\n Child 3.0 weighs 8lb. 12oz., measures 20.5 inches in length, and comes equipped with fully functioning lungs, bladder, and bowels. At present, Child 3.0 has limited functionality apart from consumption, evacuation, and noise production, though the partners assure the public that it is fully upgradeable and new features will be added regularly. Those familiar with the company\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s first two products, Child 1.0 (codenamed \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Simon\u00e2\u20ac? and built before company headquarters were relocated to Austin) and Child 2.0 (codenamed \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Nathan\u00e2\u20ac? and experiencing some compatibility issues with Child 3.0), will recognize many features characteristic of Smith Industries, including ample proportions and pudgy pudgy cheeks.
\n At a press conference held this morning at North Austin Medical Center, Chief Technology Officer Derrick M. Smith and Chief Operating Officer Julie M. Smith addressed criticisms concerning Child 3.0’s poorly working sleep functionality. They said they fully expect to patch the sleep problem within the next two to three years.<\/p>\n
A visual representation of the product is shown below:<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
[Kaimi’s note: Word from Julie’s husband Derrick is that she is doing fine, and so is the baby. She is just suffering from one ailment — lack of internet access in the hospital. Hopefully that will be cured soon. Congratulations Julie, Derrick, and Smith Children 1.0 through 3.0!]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
NEW PRODUCT ANNOUNCEMENT FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE AUSTIN, Texas \u00e2\u20ac\u201c October 28, 2004 \u00e2\u20ac\u201c Smith Industries LLC today proudly announces the release of their latest product, Child 3.0. Also known as \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Truman Michael Smith,\u00e2\u20ac? Child 3.0 has been under development for nine months and arrives just in time for the holiday season.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1522","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-corn"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1522","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1522"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1522\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1522"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1522"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/timesandseasons.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1522"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}