Lest anyone miss it, here is a gem from Grasshopper that was hiding in the comments:
Jonah was a prophet, swallowed by a whale.
When he was on board, the ship just couldn’t sail.
So they tossed him over, next thing that he knew,
Nineveh repented, Jonah had to, too.
Swallow the prophet, swallow the prophet, swallow the prophet, won’t get away;
Swallow the prophet, swallow the prophet, swallow the prophet; he’ll find the way.
I hereby nominate this song and Kaimi’s “Put Potatoes with the Veal” (which I can’t find; what thread was it in, Kaimi??) as the inaugural entries in the Times and Seasons Satirical Song contest. Entries must fit with a hymn tune or Primary song from the LDS canon. Prizes will be awarded on the entirely rational and objective criterion of how much Diet Coke I splurt through my nose while reading the entries. Entries which cause lightning to strike my computer will be disqualified.